We’ve now been back in Melbourne, FL for nearly 3 weeks. Wow, the time goes by so quickly. We’ve been non-stop busy ever since we landed, and have little time for much else than the highest of priorities.
The highest priority has been of course my father. We spend a good portion of our time soaking up every quality moment we can, and helping assist in his care-taking so my mom can take breaks. His condition is pretty weak these days – the last round of chemo really took it out of him. We’re doing our best to make every moment count for him and keeping him from boredom.
While it’s been understandably incredibly difficult (and I’ve been avoiding talking about it much here because it is difficult) – my parents are not only mom and dad, but some of my closest friends and business partners of nearly 20 years; there is of course no where else we’d rather be than right here going through this with them. And we’ll remain here for as long as we’re needed.
We feel so incredibly blessed that our nomadic lifestyle has allowed us to really and truly be here throughout his battle with lung cancer for the last nearly 3 years. And while we’re now flying the surrender flag, it really is a gift that we have this time to settle out as many of his affairs together, and part ways on this journey of life with no words left unsaid.
When we get back to the bus in the evening, we then have many hours ahead of us to keep up with our various business endeavors. It’s not been unusual for us to be burning the midnight oil (ok, LED lights) well into daybreak.
It hasn’t helped that the business situation that hit us at the beginning of the year continues to be unresolved, leaving a major income source in question for the long term. It’s a complicated situation, and beyond the scope of this blog to share the details – but suffice it to say, it’s been a very stress-inducing experience for us these past few months.
So we have been putting extra focus into ramping up other income streams ‘just in case’. So yup, our work hours have increased through all of this. We have a couple more months of known income coming in before we (hopefully) know the longer term outcome.
We’ll be in no dire straits either way – we trust in our adaptability and that things will work themselves out as they should. It’s just stressful trying to juggle so much.
The timing of the business stuff with the family stuff colliding could not be any less ideal. I’d much rather be able to put the work stuff a bit more on the sidelines right now. But then again, I’ve been self-employed in a family business for nearly 2 decades for now – rarely are those two aspects of my life far from each other.
So for now, it’s long day after long day for us as we try to do it all.
Despite the moments of sheer overwhelm, we’re mostly hanging in there. Chris and I have each other, and we’re a strong partnership committed to each other in a very consciously entangled web of love, life, family and business. I am truly blessed.
And oh goodness, are we so thankful for having established our bus – an Á¼ber comfortable condo on wheels. I could not imagine going through all this in something confined like our past RVs – the Oliver or Tab. It would have been absolutely maddening – serendipity spoke at the right time for us to make the transition to bus life.
Anyway, sometimes writing content for this blog is a nice therapeutic escape. And sometimes, it’s the last thing I have energy for and we’d rather just be big slumps of goo on the couch catching up on various TV series and worshipping Kiki to get our minds off things.
So I anticipate that this blog space will remain sporadic for the foreseeable future, sharing what we can when we have the time and energy. In the meantime, we will continue doing the livestreamed video sessions – as those take far less time for us to answer a lot of questions at once, and have been a very fun and rewarding experience. And we find our Facebook page to have a pretty high rate of engagement.
And afterall, that’s our main purpose in keeping this space, to engage with you. Please don’t hesitate to be in touch (just please keep questions to a minimum or save them for our Q&A sessions.)
I know you are very big on the sense of “community” Cherie and I found an excellent support system in Inspire.com. There is a group for family members and caregivers for those affected by lung cancer. I know you are very busy online but wanted to let you know about this resource if you or your mom ever need to connect with others of us who are living and have lived what you are facing…hugs as usual..
http://www.inspire.com/groups/lung-cancer-survivors/topics/family-members-and-caregivers/
It’s lovely to read all the eloquent warm wishes; beauty along with the sadness. Wishing peace and grace for you and your beloved family. You’re in our thoughts.
Wishing peace and grace for you all. You’re in our thoughts.
I suspected the news wasn’t good for you but all things and lives must pass at some point. You wrote a lovely story. That bus does afford you a luxury of family time few can afford. Here’s my sympathy to you during this difficult time. You will never regret the time you spend. Thank you for sharing your situation with us.
Wishing you nothing but positive thoughts during this difficult time…How lucky for all of you that you can spend so much time there….
You sound great in the midst of the change. I lost my mom to cancer it will be 3yrs in May. If I can suggest ask all the questions you ever wanted to ask. Like the meaning of life. The answer my mom gave was funny. Feed your dad all his favorite foods all day every day. My mom liked anything chocolate or lemmon. Even when you don’t think they know your there they do. lastly make sure you,Chris, and your mom drink lots of water every day you’ll understand later why.
With much love and prayer Paula
I can’t hope to live up to the eloquence of some of these other comments, but just wanted to let you know that you’re all in my thoughts as well.
I can hardly imagine how taxing it must be juggling work related struggles with illness in the family, I’m having a hard enough time just dealing with the former.
Strength and love, and cherish the memories you’re making now.
No words can really convey what I want to say, but our thoughts and love are with you at this time. Life is a mix of easy times and difficult passages. The latter is unpredictable and hard. Nothing we can do but ride the wave, work our way through the hardships and make the best of the positive moments we are given. The gift of being close to your father at this time is an important one that you will carry with you for life. Best of {{vibes}} to you.
Nina
Cherie, this is a most difficult time of life. I can relate because I drove my bus conversion from a California winter boondocking site to Merritt Island a few days ago to deal with the loss of my mother. Our lives are very similar, even in these saddest of times. I have enjoyed riding along on your travels and just missed you at AirVenture last summer. I still look forward to meeting you both, but I know you’re really busy right now. If a rendezvous is possible, please let me know. We have a lot to talk about.
Hi Ron – thank you for writing. Rendezvouses are always possible, and diversions always appreciated – we have very little social network here. We’re staying just a bit south of you. Feel free to drop us a line directly at us@technomadia.com if you’d like to meet up.
CHERIE, MY THOUGHTS ARE WITH YOU DURING THIS OF SO SPECIAL AND STRESSFUL TIME. MY FATHER’S PASSING OF THE SAME ILLNESS WAS VERY QUICK AND DID NOT AFFORD A LOT OF TIME FOR THOSE SPECIAL MOMENTS. PLEASE DO GIVE YOUR MOM AND DAD A HUG FROM ME AND TELL YOU DAD (FUNNY, WHEN I JUST TYPED “DAD”, IT CAME OUT “DATA”). ANYWAY, TELL HIM HIS FAITH IN MY ABILITY TO HANDLE THE WONDERFUL CARE MANAGEMENT SOFTWARE WAS ONE OF THE BEST STEPS FORWARD IN MY CAREER. CONSIDERS YOURSELVES HUGGED. CANDLES ARE LIT AND PRAYERS ARE ONGOING. GAIL
Thank you so much dear Gail- for your words, for keeping in touch and for being the awesome you. The system we worked on together with you remains the highlight of our combined careers. So many special memories – and a perfect example of the best kind of business, ones in which love and friendship carry on beyond our client relationships. M&M just visited this week as well, there were many hugs and toasts to you. Wishing you and Dick all my best.
Oh goodness… I am so completely humbled by all this amazing outpouring of support, positive thoughts and love. It warms my heart, and makes it a little easier to not feel so isolated going though this. Thank you so much!
Love & hugs to you both! The business stuff, although not a welcome stressor right now, must have an integral part to play in your current “playbook”. When it gets to the point that you truly can’t handle it anymore, it will most likely resolve. Ah life…..
So glad you two are the very people that you are. So glad that your parents have you.
What a beautiful story of love and family. You are an inspiration to so many. Hang in there – it’s tough to go through all this stuff, but you will make it.
Hi Cherie. My mom died just before we hit the road. She knew almost a year ahead of time. I have to tell you that the time she and I spent together during that year I would never give up. It’s amazing and wonderful even though sadness lay ahead. She pushed away treatment and after that we did what we could to keep her comfortable. AND let her do whatever she wanted. She and I had the most wonderful conversations. I also have to say that she was always a bit of a smart ass and took a certain amount of pleasure in startling people with her humor during that last year. I miss her everyday but most of the time when I think of her there’s a bit of a giggle involved. There’s something to be said about knowing about the end. It gives you leave to tell everyone what you really think instead of being pc about it. Mom also enjoyed giving away a lot of her stuff pre-death and getting the enjoyment of seeing how much those she presented with these gifts received.
My heart goes out to you. No matter your age, losing a parent is just so hard.
My thoughts are also with you.
Bill Kelleher
My prayers are with you. Times are thought when people close to you are suffering. Reading from afar, I feel like a friend. Thanks for sharing. Peace!
Your ability to keep to your priorities is an inspiration. Your Dad is so fortunate to have such a loving family.
My thoughts are with you,
Suzanne
Cherie & Chris, Keep doing what you’re doing – Hanging in There. Enjoying every minute you can with your dad is what’s most important now, the other stuff is just what-ya-gotta-do. You are both stronger than you realize, you’ll get thru this. Thanks for blogging, to keep in touch, however much you can do is fine, you are worth ‘waiting for’. Patty-in-Pasadena
Cherie
Just wondering if you have heard of Bernie Siegel MD? He has a couple of great, great books but in “Love, Medicine & Miracles” he has a part about the stage that you seem to be in that talks about finding grace and meaning…not trying to be presumptuous about what you need right now but as you know we are fighting the same fight your family has been and Bernie’s books have helped me immensely…sending good Karma to all of you at this difficult time….
Thanks Linda… we’re well beyond the point of seeking more information, and are definitely embracing ‘grace and meaning’. Our time is too precious to spend it reading books, instead of focusing on what is important.
Wishing you and your family all our best as well. These are tough times indeed.
Hi Cherie…..I can not be there to give your Dad a huge loving hug, so I’m asking that you give him a big hug and tell him it’s from his Auntie D who loves him so much! He is a Trooper – a true Warrior! He and I have been very close for well over 60 years…..sending my most positive prayers and wishes his way! <3
Cherie and Chris
I too am sending you positive energy and prayers. You are right where you need to be- with your peeps. Taking care of each other and sharing time. It is such a gift. Take care of yourself too. In such stressful times when you’re trying to do everything, you need to remember yourself too. Get your ZZZ’s. Hydrate. You know 🙂
I glad you can be where you need to be doing what you need to do. We’ll still be here whenever you need us.
Cherie, I’m sending cyber hugs and white light wishes to you and Chris during this difficult time. But I really admire your statement: “we trust in our adaptability and that things will work themselves out as they should.” I understand the stress of trying to juggle too much and income streams you counted on being interrupted. Also agree that RVing gives many opportunities to be in places where needed when otherwise it would be much more difficult. So sorry about your dad – I also know that heart wrenching experience and I wish you all the strength you need to keep juggling! Malia